


The Morning After

by TabbieWolf



Category: Lupin III
Genre: Anxiety, Drabble, Drunkenness, Literal Sleeping Together, Multi, Non-romantic love, Not really a ship fic, holy cow, not porn for once
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-18
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-27 14:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30124353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TabbieWolf/pseuds/TabbieWolf
Summary: Lupin III and Daisuke Jigen assist a very drunk Inspector Zenigata.
Relationships: Jigen Daisuke & Arsène Lupin III, Jigen Daisuke/Arsène Lupin III, Jigen Daisuke/Arsène Lupin III/Zenigata Kouichi
Comments: 1
Kudos: 48





	The Morning After

**Author's Note:**

> This little fic exists because of [an amazing piece of art done by Cyo](https://twitter.com/sexMeatOUPS/status/1372266546949677060?s=20), with the ending helped along hugely by the amazingly talented [Hawkens](https://archiveofourown.org/users/John_Hawkens/pseuds/John_Hawkens) :D
> 
> Thank you for reading!

Inspector Koichi Zenigata, established Interpol employee, well-respected police detective, stumbled out of the bar with a hiccup. He paused, pondering for a moment how far he was from his current hotel, pondered for another moment whether he’d had anything for dinner, and then walked in what he hoped was the general direction of where he’d be sleeping that night.

The evening had gone _terribly_. He rubbed his eyes, his hairy knuckles brushing his hat. The collar of his trench coat drooped behind his head and the inspector drooped along with it, supporting himself against the walls of the shops, the sodium vapor glare of the street lights creating a great shadow under him.

Everything had been laid out perfectly, and he’d come so close, and once again, the thief had gotten away. Sure, the treasure Lupin’d been after had been fine, dropped or fallen on the roof of the building he’d jumped from to get away, his bright jacketed form sliding into the dark with boyish laughter, but that wasn’t the point of it. The point of it was that Zenigata had failed at capturing him _again_ , and he’d settled into a reasonably quiet local bar — not too far from his hotel...he _thought_ anyway — and drank.

And drank.

And drank.

He was a big man, and it took him a fair bit to get tipsy. The bartender hadn’t cut him off, exactly, but _had_ offered to call him a cab. Zenigata blinked, mentioned his hotel, and politely paid his bill before he wandered back into the dark, lonely night.

“Hey...is that Pops?”

Zenigata turned, surprised and a little bit angry at the nickname. The thief’s name was halfway out of his mouth when a hand came around and covered it.

“Sssshhh, Pops. It’s like 4 in the morning. Someone’ll call the cops.”

“He IS the cops, Lupin.”

“Even worse then, he’ll have backup.”

Zenigata stumbled, trying to lift an arm, and instead burped, then covered his mouth.

The bearded man in the hat smirked, fanning the air with his hand. “Whoof, Pops, you are _wasted_.”

Lupin was flipping through the cards in the wallet he’d easily slid out of Zenigata’s back pocket. “Looks like his hotel is a few blocks from here. Also check this out.” The thief held up a photo.

Jigen blinked. “Huh. It’s us.”

“Yeah. Cute!”

“Little weird, Lu.”

“Shush.” Lupin tucked the cards and photo back in the wallet, carefully putting it back in Zenigata’s pants, patting his butt as he did so. The inspector grumbled Lupin’s name again, leaning a shoulder against the closed door of a shop.

“He is _really_ drunk, though.” Jigen raised an eyebrow, though it wasn’t visible in the shadow of his hat. Zenigata mumbled inebriated nothings to himself. “Should we take him back to his hotel?”

“It’d be shorter to take him to our place.” Lupin said plainly. He wrapped an arm around the inspector’s waist. “C’mon, Pops.”

“M’gonna...get Lupin...” Zenigata slurred.

“Mhm, Pops, I think _I’ve_ got _you_ tonight.” Lupin agreed. He nodded at Jigen. “Can you get his other side?”

“Man, if he pukes on me...”

“I’ll cover the dry cleaning, you know that. Come on.”

Both men were glad that the hideout where they were didn’t involve stairs — Zenigata was awkward to guide even when he wasn’t drunk, and his big frame stumbling backwards occasionally made for an interesting few minutes. Jigen hastily unlocked the door of what looked like a boarded up storefront, opening on a strangely assembled living space.

The inspector hiccuped. The two men leaned him against the ancient sofa and started taking off his clothing.

“What’re...what’re you...hmmm...doing?” Zenigata asked, slowly, blinking as Jigen hung his coat and hat next to Lupin’s jacket.

“Getting you changed, Pops, you smell like a still.” Jigen answered, though he suspected Zenigata wasn’t listening. “Trust me, I’d know.” The gunman half-smiled, slowly peeling the inspector out of his suit. Lupin was kneeling on the floor, untying his shoes.

“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever noticed how small Pops’s feet are.” the thief mused, setting the big man’s boots aside.

“I think _you_ just have really big feet.” Jigen responded as he gently lifted Zenigata’s arms one at a time, pulling his undershirt over his head. He made a face. “We gotta get him some stronger deodorant.”

“I’ve got a shirt that’ll fit him, hang on.” Lupin ducked through a doorway on the other side of the room.

“LUPIN! You’re — hic! — under arrest!” Zenigata nearly shouted, stumbling forward with a pointed finger in the air. Jigen casually grabbed his shoulder to prevent him from falling over.

The two skinny men were tugging one of Lupin’s branded t-shirts down over Zenigata’s head when Jigen finally brought up, “Lu. Where’s he gonna. You know. Sleep.”

“With us, of course.”

“Oh, of course. I should’ve guessed.”

“Bed’s big enough. He’ll fall off the sofa.” Lupin pointed out.

“You can help him get to the toilet, then. Since I’m giving up mattress space.” Jigen was happy to leave that particular task to Lupin, and he went to change for bed. The thief was about to object — he’d be sharing the bed too, after all — but Zenigata grumbled loudly, asking about something nonsensical and rubbing at his boxers, and Lupin sighed, pushing him towards the bathroom.

~*~

The world was blurry and overly bright as Inspector Zenigata blinked awake. A headache nudged at the corners of his eyes, and he squinted, trying to lift a hand to rub his forehead, when he realized he couldn’t move his arms.

A moment of panic — _How drunk did I get last night? What did I do?_ — followed by a deep breath. He looked to his left, then to his right. He blinked, paused, and then looked again.

On his left arm, his dark hair and beard fluffed up from being in bed, snoring the deep, throaty snores of a longtime smoker, was Daisuke Jigen. On his right arm — really, just on his entire right side, snuggled around him like an koala being very enthusiastic with a eucalyptus tree, was Lupin the Third.

_How drunk did I get last night?!_

Zenigata stared at the ceiling, wide-eyed, trying to figure out how on earth he ended up here...and, also reasonably important, where exactly his pants had gone.

Lupin nuzzled his nose into Zenigata’s neck. “Morning, Pops. How’s your hangover?”

“Uhhhh...”

“We gave you some water and aspirin last night before you...” Lupin paused, going over the night in his head. “Fell asleep? Passed out?”

“Lupin, what—“

“You were pr-et-ty drunk, Pops.” Lupin danced his fingers across Zenigata’s chest. “We didn’t even get the loot last night, what’s the big deal? You won.”

“I...didn’t, though.” Zenigata sighed, finally moving his arm so he could rub his temple. _I didn’t get you._ The words sat on his tongue, waiting to be said, but the inspector didn’t say them.

Lupin stretched. Jigen snuffled, grunting through a snore, blinking awake.

“Oh, hey, Pops. How’s your head?”

Zenigata grumbled.

Lupin smirked, finally uncurling from his cuddle hold and stretching as he stood up off the mattress. “I’ve got a really good hangover cure breakfast recipe.”

“It better not be some weird vegetable...health...egg...smoothie...thing.” Zenigata said, finally resting his arm across his now-closed eyes, moving his other across his stomach.

“Nah, it’s like, shredded potatoes cooked in bacon. There’s cheese. It’s fantastic.” He could hear Jigen’s joints crack as he got up. “Plus I think we’ve got coffee.”

“Coffee...would be good.” Zenigata finally said, very quietly, trying his best to ignore how utterly strange the situation was.

Jigen directed him to the bathroom — “You’re hungover, you get first dibs.” — and Zenigata found his footing after a few missteps, closing the door behind him. He turned on the light, groaned at the bright fluorescent hum, turned off the light, and blinked in the dim illumination coming in through the tiny plate glass window.

The inspector splashed water on his face and looked in the mirror, rubbing the top of his nose with a thumb and forefinger. His eyes were bloodshot, and that headache was still lurking in the corners, but he felt surprisingly okay considering. Lupin and Jigen’s help last night had saved him from who knows what; definitely a nasty hangover, possibly waking up in a jail cell for public drunkenness. He wondered exactly what they were after.

Zenigata listened to Lupin, who was whistling some jazzy song in the kitchen area, and Jigen, gruffly laughing at some probably obscene joke about cheese. He could smell the coffee already, and his stomach rumbled. Maybe he could call a truce with the men, just this once.

At least until breakfast was over.


End file.
